On_Safari

On_Safari

F54

Guys who reflect thier insecurities/issues on you.

February 06 2013

Hello RHP Brains Trust, Am asking this for the benefit of a friend who has been seeing a "gentleman" for a few months now. He is a FIFO worker, his contact with her varies from being intermittent to very attentive depending on visits to town. The scene I witnessed tonight was, quite frankly; not what I would expect from a real man. He was supposed to visit her this evening, as plan B I suggested she come here, have dinner and watch a movie if he was a no show. (He's done this to her before last minute with little or no explanation.) Told her to txt him earlier in the afternoon to confirm whether or not he was coming to visit. He was non-commital, said he was in a meeting at 4.10pm. 2hrs later he said he wasn't coming over and was in his hotel room but then asked her out for lunch. By 8.00 he definately hadn't shown so I went to collect her, I parked in the driveway; didn't get out of the car and motor and lights were on and was there for 10 minutes while she got her shit together. In the five minutes it took for us to get back to my place he had text her asking who the bloke was? He then said he had driven past her place and saw she had company and lied saying he had caught a boat over from the island he was on to see her? I mean come on, for starters the ferries don't run that often (and I know this for a fact having worked on site at the various locations) and how convenient there happened to be a ferry heading back in that ½ hour!! Wouldn't most men have stopped thier car (if he actually did show up, because I don't recall any cars coming down the street in that time) to atleast go in and say hello? What really got me offside though as a friend was the fact that he had the hide to accuse her of having another bloke around and implying she was lying. She rang him from my place and conveniently he txt back saying he had no signal. When I rang I got his voicemail and told him straight that it was me in the driveway and I had picked her up for a girl's night since he was dicking her around and how dare he imply completely without any cause that there was another man around. He has put her on an emotional rollercoaster for 2mths and never makes the effort to converse or see her when it's convenient for her ONLY him. Personally I think she's dodged a bullet, any thoughts because she's thinking it's her not him?

Comments

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    But I read "stalking" in that scenario.......

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    MARRIED!!!

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    cheating, lying, stalking, possessive, weirdo ... :-)

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Married, maybe not... Insecure? You bet. Holding out for another offer which fell through? Almost certainly. A rolled gold bastard? Take it to the bank. Trust me, guys don't like to be dicked around in these scenarios :( But some of them fail to realise that it's a two way street - pretty simple - you wouldn't like it done to you, so don't do it to somebody else. It's twits like this that make my aspirations here harder to achieve, because we all tend to be treated more cautiously by ladies who've been in this situation. Safari, it ain't your friend. Complete lack of manners and chivalry - a revocation of man licence for mine.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    This guy sounds like high maintenance, controlling manipulative, obsessive and possessive.   If she is getting somewhat frustrated and why put up with it? There are plenty plenty more fish in the sea.   I would have ditched him long ago, an to have the gaul to accuse her of seeing another, well hello!.... this is a sex site, nsa in most cases, why this exclusivity? And to insinuate it is her not him, well....I would show him the door, with boot up bum.   Life is too short, you are entitled to have fun and enjoyment if others stand in judgement and put you down and waste your time you should take time to rethink the situation. Life shouldn't be so complicated.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Plain and simple, he's a TOSSER.Why waste any more energy on him?

  • On_Safari

    On_Safari

    13 years ago

    Err she stayed in my spare room lastnight and worked all day, he txt a heap of apologies and excuses but she remained staunch in her resolve he's an ass. Tosser just txt me. Hi (insert my name here)! Just thought I'd let you know (GF's name) and I had great make up sex. :) I txt back: Was that before or after I fucked her? Tosser: hahaha nice. Why wasn't I invited? Hmmmm where's the block button on his oxygen????

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    She needs to let it go. Its a long road for some of us to weed through the bad to find a keeper! Obviously he is playing her. If he was really into her then he would show it. Good luck to her, she isn't the only one going through it!- Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    It's the profuse apologising, while still being a dick, that's the sure sign of a maniac. - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Be it married, girlfriend,other FWB's willing to put up with such behaviours his time is otherwise engaged.Many women know that Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important to remember that apparently some men, by elimination,think dishonesty is the second-best policy

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Definate Stalker with Ulterior Motives & Hidden Agendas . Wouldn't trust him as far as I could kick him . Get out now while the Going's Good . I know I sound like a Cliche but so does he ...- Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    definitely time to cry .. NEXT >>

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    'RUN AWAY, RUN AWAY!'

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Ditch him asap,jsk

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    I don't get it, why do women allow men to use them as a convenience and to treat them like crap into the bargain. I would forgive one no show or late cancellation but no more. Sorry, Safari I would have told this guy to fuck off a long long time ago. Come on girls!! Tell these losers to take a hike already! - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    he sounds like a man of sensitivity,great inteligence,secure in his masculinity,NOT...some people are addicted to drama,the adrenline rush of causing distress,and seeing the reaction. cos the makeup sex is just great. I have just spent the last three hours Safari, with a friend who has been jerked around like this for three years.Sometimes we get what we think we deserve,I hope your friend stays strong and doesn't allow him to play his nasty game again.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Is it his insecurity you should be worried about or hers? There are heaps of better men out there than him by the sounds of it. Don't waste time on a time waster. have the confidence to do better. I agree with everybody else. If its broken, go get yourself another model.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    He'd have called and spoken to her. txt and email apologies always seem insincere to me. If you care enough to say sorry you should really do it face to face.As a few people here said to me when I posted the "Misrepresented" thread 2 weeks ago, forget about it and move on.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Sorry Safari,   I didn't recognise it was your car! It was dark and I was jet-lagged and confused! Honest! You know that if I had, I would have been in there like a shot, you sexy thing!

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Sounds all too messy for me... I avoid all complication stuff - does my head in. I'm with Meeka...Yep would've told him to F*ck off long ago!! Hope your friend learns from this experience.. SuperFox - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    LOON!

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Quoting 'Meeka100' I don't get it, why do women allow men to use them as a convenience and to treat them like crap into the bargain. I would forgive one no show or late cancellation but no more. Sorry, Safari I would have told this guy to fuck off a long long time ago. Come on girls!! Tell these losers to take a hike already! - Posted from rhpmobileRight on Meeka!!! Time after time i hear girls putting up with this type of crap! He obviously doesnt respect you, or your time, why the hell would you hang around?!

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Well my guess is She is the next best fuck when he cant find another.   Plus he sounds like he has issues ...   Is that a Hill better run for it as i see this turning into a steady fuck as nothing else is on offer that builds up to more and then your mate is looking to take out a VRO ... Get out now

  • On_Safari

    On_Safari

    13 years ago

    Quoting 'Obi1Kenietzsche' Sorry Safari,   I didn't recognise it was your car! It was dark and I was jet-lagged and confused! Honest! You know that if I had, I would have been in there like a shot, you sexy thing!     Damn you OB1, damn you to HELLLLLLL!!!! The pool would have been more fun with you in it......     Thanks to all, GF isn't on a dating site per se trying to talk her into losing her RHP "V" plates. Anyone want to take on a 30yo blonde? And I guess the lesson here is 'tis better to have loved and lust than to let your apparatus rust.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Quoting 'On_Safari' Quoting 'Obi1Kenietzsche' Sorry Safari,   I didn't recognise it was your car! It was dark and I was jet-lagged and confused! Honest! You know that if I had, I would have been in there like a shot, you sexy thing!     Damn you OB1, damn you to HELLLLLLL!!!! The pool would have been more fun with you in it......     Thanks to all, GF isn't on a dating site per se trying to talk her into losing her RHP "V" plates. Anyone want to take on a 30yo blonde? And I guess the lesson here is 'tis better to have loved and lust than to let your apparatus rust.        SO....it appears now after seeing this post that..is was not your friend you were seeking advice for on this situation at all...He outed himself....Priceless.........There is no vaccine against stupidity.What I've learnt - to my cost - on several occasions in my life, is that people will put up with all manner of bad behaviour so long as you're giving them what they want. They'll laugh and get into it and enjoy the anecdotes and the craziness and the mayhem as long as you're doing it well, but the minute you're not, you're f@#%ed. They'll wipe their hands of you without a second glance

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Whoa there Nudi ! 'Twas not "I" that did the foul deed (Safari will vouch for me) . Nay, if I was in the general location, I would have been either sitting IN Safari's old ute, not driving past like an obsessive maniac, or better still, I would have been INSIDE, offering them BOTH a better alternative to a whiney, insecure man-child!! PS Safari, re: your blond friend, do you really need to ask?

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    PPS: The only time I "out myself" is when I have to leave really early in the morning!

  • On_Safari

    On_Safari

    13 years ago

    OB1 only "outs" himself in the morning ummmm 'cept when he's outting himself to please his partner. You're such a good man sweetheart but the ute is my runaround. When I'm "out" for the evening I drive a big black Dodge Avenger, which is why you didn't realise it was me in the dark. You would have been very welcome to join, but not together; I don't DO my girlfriends. Sorry. As for my friend Nudie I talked her into joining. I introduce y'all to Moodleberry_Lane, be gentle in her own words she's sooooo vanilla she's nearly water. :-). Pls make her feel welcome, she has a sharp wit and I've been telling her she'll enjoy the forums immensely. Warmest thanks for your supportive words guys and girls.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    For my assumption which arrived rather quickly after i saw "I didn't recognise it was your car! It was dark and I was jet-lagged and confused!"then when the further reply of "Damn you OB1, damn you to HELLLLLLL!!!! The pool would have been more fun with you in it" Came alongQuoting 'On_Safari' OB1 only "outs" himself in the morning ummmm 'cept when he's outting himself to please his partner. You're such a good man sweetheart but the ute is my runaround. When I'm "out" for the evening I drive a big black Dodge Avenger, which is why you didn't realise it was me in the dark. You would have been very welcome to join, but not together; I don't DO my girlfriends. Sorry. As for my friend Nudie I talked her into joining. I introduce y'all to Moodleberry_Lane, be gentle in her own words she's sooooo vanilla she's nearly water. :-). Pls make her feel welcome, she has a sharp wit and I've been telling her she'll enjoy the forums immensely. Warmest thanks for your supportive words guys and girls. For my assumption which arrived rather quickly after i saw "I didn't recognise it was your car! It was dark and I was jet-lagged and confused!"then when the further reply of Damn you OB1, damn you to HELLLLLLL!!!! The pool would have been more fun with you in it" Came along...well...as i said my apologies to both of you for my assumption

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Its time for her to CUT TIES, If it was me I would want to spend my time with the lady inmy life after a stint out working, sounds like he has beter things to do and its not with your friend unfortunately

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Dear Nudi,   Satisfaction in defence of my good name not required as I am actually of questionable character anyway. No harm done, no dueling at dawn, but apology acepted anyway so thank you!.

  • On_Safari

    On_Safari

    13 years ago

    The post was genuine in it's intent. Sometimes things get so serious in these topics that we take it all too literally. I still think a sense of humour helps and taking some of this stuff with a grain of salt is a good idea. I've been corrected before, no doubt it'll happen again or I'll upset somebody. Still a big fan of the less said soonest mended thing. OB1 if you're ever up this way........Questionable and dubious are traits I can work with. Mr Tough Love hasn't seen any daylight for quite a while...hee hee. Stay beautiful, OS

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Quoting 'LittleRedEngine'txt and email apologies always seem insincere to me. If you care enough to say sorry you should really do it face to face.And I hope your friend sticks to her resolve and waits for a real man.