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RHP

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F37

I Feel Like Such An Idiot!

October 29 2010

Last week against my better judgment I met up with an older (39) local guy from Hervey Bay. Now usually I have a “No Local Men” rule & for very good reasons. But this time I thought maybe he might be different. So I risked meeting up with this guy & going out to dinner. He was a nice enough guy over dinner & we got along pretty well so I went back to his house to watch a movie. As soon as we got there I realised that something didn’t quite add up as there where pictures of children in the house & toys. When I asked him about this he simply said he & his partner where divorced and that she lived locally and that every second week he would look after the children. After that night I caught up with him one more time but decided that there wasn’t enough attraction on my end to continue on with meeting up & something still didn’t feel right. It was then he started to get a little creepy & started constantly texting me at all times of the day & night. This was enough to put me off so I stopped replying to his messages. A few days later after ignoring countless texts from this male I received a message saying that his home & personal situation would be changing in a week & that we should catch up one more time because it would be hard to sneak me over to his house!. It turns out his wife was overseas on holiday with the kids for a month. So he lied to me about his relationship status after I asked him to his face if he was single.. After receiving this message I rang him to tell him to never contact me again and he had the nerve to ask if I was still coming over! He expected me to drop everything to catch up before his wife got home! I mean WFT! This is the first time anything like this has happened to me & I feel like such a bloody idiot for falling into the trap! This has completely put me off older men & local men even more so! (Not that I wasn’t put off by local men already) That’s it from now on I’m sticking to my 4 golden rules! 1. No Local Men 2. No Men Under The Age of 25 or over 35 3. No picking up from clubs, pubs, bars or party’s 4. If there house doesn’t match up with their story... run for the hills!

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Comments

  • AdventurousGent

    AdventurousGent

    15 years ago

    Learning from mistakes... :-) take care.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Sorry you had such an experience Tabby but there are some serious flaws in you reasoning here. 1. So men between the ages of 25 and 35 are not maried? Do not have children or do not lie about their situation? 2. That only men from Hervey Bay will spin these lies? 3. The implication that ALL men at pubs, clubs, bars and parties are liars, cheats, married men. This means that yoou can rule out meeting anyone in the more conventional, old fashioned way. No matter how careful you are, you are going to meet up with similar situations from time to time. No need to feel like an idiot. Just build a bridge.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Ah. Bless his heart. Perhaps you should view it as a compliment though... if even unwanted and selfish... a compliment all the same. That or you could throw stones at him and cuss obscenities at him in a foriegn language. Or tie him up, stuff him full of lollies and smack his ass with a stick like the human pinata he is. Or write him a series of discreet love letters with the return address marked as the big, hairy bikie man from up the road. x

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Tabs just remember we are not all lying, cheating so and so's. Don't limit yourself too much but I am guessing that from now on you will approach with more caution. Chin up, next night out will be a big one for sure.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Sounds like you fell foul of a guy who was willing to lie to get his way, not your fault and I suppose something to learn from. Fionabee is right though, perhaps those rules are actually going to stop you from meeting a great guy the old-fashioned way! I would agree with your last rule, if something doesn't add up at their house, or in any other way, it is probably too good to be true. Always better to play it safe. Hope you have better luck next time :)

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Hey Tab, don't feel so bad. People can be very misleading and exceptionally convincing when motivated. I can't imagine many men would stop short of lying to get a hotty like you into bed. Some people make a very good living from deceiving others.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    So much happened in just 1 week.... His house didnt add up to you.... Sorry your story doesnt add up to me..... Dazi

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    hun id tell him if he doesnt piss of and leave you be you will pop around one day and have a nice chat to his wife that will shut him up lol roxxy

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    life about liveing and learning . My father told me that you can learn from your mistakes and he also told me that you can learn quicker if you , learn from others peoples mistakes rember what does not kill you makes you stronger. thats life not all guys are like that good hunting for the what you are looking for

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Quoting 'applestrudel' you could throw stones at him and cuss obscenities at him in a foriegn language. Or tie him up, stuff him full of lollies and smack his ass with a stick like the human pinata he is. Or write him a series of discreet love letters with the return address marked as the big, hairy bikie man from up the road. x My lovely applestrudel, come clean, you've done this before. I can clear envisage you composing such love letters with a twinkle in your eye and vengence in your heart xx

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Don't feel bad, you weren't to know. What bothered you the most? was it the fact you were lied to or the fact he was married?.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    LOL tell me about could write a book on it... Come to think of it just might do it one day LOL.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Wow that is really Bad! At least he could have been honest about it! But sadly there is way too many people like that in Hervey Bay!

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Hey doll,I lived in the bay for 14 months and now I have moved back to Brisbane. That's a hint

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    As suggested live and learn, it really isn't your fault that this guy chose to be so dishonest and as soon as you found him out you split so you made the right decision.I do agree with Fionabee that your 4 rules may not prevent this happening again, it is a sad but true fact that not just here on RHP but out in the big bad world at large there are people who choose to deceive others not just in this way but so many others no amount of 'wisdom'or experience can prevent it entirely but i am a firm believer in trusting your gut, if it doesn't feel right then it probably isn't and you should go with that.Best of luck and try not to beat yourself up about it,Mrs GC

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    You know what...you did the right thing all along. You acted honestly and did everything you could to ensure you weren't going into a situation you didn't agree with. Unfortunately, the guy lied to you despite all of that. I know it sucks that you were on the end of it, but really it's HIS problem that he lied. If he wants to live his life that way then that's his decision. You need a good experience to get past this one. **hugs**

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Quoting 'brownbrowneyes' Quoting 'applestrudel' you could throw stones at him and cuss obscenities at him in a foriegn language. Or tie him up, stuff him full of lollies and smack his ass with a stick like the human pinata he is. Or write him a series of discreet love letters with the return address marked as the big, hairy bikie man from up the road. x My lovely applestrudel, come clean, you've done this before. I can clear envisage you composing such love letters with a twinkle in your eye and vengence in your heart xx Oh but Brownbrown from out of town..... how correct you are. I am the master of sabotage. I will go for the heart. I have no shame nor mercy. My love letters will bring you undone. xx

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    I cant believe guys still do that, but worse was his attitude after you told him not to contact you. "you still comming over?" wtf is wrong with these guys???

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    but also I was going to point out some flaws in your rules but fionabee already did that. but, do go with your experiences, and dont change something unless it's broken. I mean if you find that generally men in your local area, in your experience is decieving then keep that rule. But bear in mind that you will need to alter the rules with your experiences...

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