I Write. It’s not sexy but fun

A WINTER'S "BORING" BECAME

"‘Twas a cold snowy evening at the home of Mr and Mrs Claus. Way up in the North Pole Santa was sprawled or in his favourite chair in front of a roaring fire necking scotch after scotch and getting, well, rather plastered. After all, he only does it on one night of the year.. "twas the night before Christmas" and because Santa feared flying with a bunch of lunatic reindeer. (The scandalous other 364 are heresay and rumour according to his lawyers and will be strongly denied in a court of laz). So there he was having a great lime when he turned to notice Mrs Claus in the kitchen wearing the apron with painted on breasts he had gotten her for of all things, Christmas. He thought to himself, she was looking radiant with her purple rinse and bun. He stood up and strode over, took her by the hand and led her too the bedroom for a little "one on one", as he called it. What Santa had neglected to notice was that the blinds were wide open and all the elves were outside, drunk from celebrating a long year throwing snow ball's at each other. They heard the strange noises and went too the window. What they witnessed has now echoed in eternity as, and I quote, the best

"Boring" that Mrs Claus had ever gotten.